Put down that pint of Phish Food and get a grip on your life.

OK, so you've just suffered the most excruciatingly painful experience this side of a root canal. But breaking up isn't the end of the world.

It's hard, sure, but you'll get through it.

Greg Behrendt did. And his breakup was probably way worse than yours.

"I really loved being the victim," said Behrendt, who co-authored "It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken" with his wife, Amiira. "I wore it a long time, put it on like a jacket. No one wants to date the broken man, to hang out with him, to invite him to ball games. I learned that the hard way."

No more drunk-dialing his ex, no more lamenting about a relationship that — despite his pleas — wasn't going to work out.

It was over. And it was time he got over it, too.

That kind of no-excuses, tell-it-like-it-is attitude is what has made this book — and his earlier title, "He's Just Not That Into You" — instant successes.

"It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken" has been on the Top 10 national bestsellers' list in nonfiction for weeks.

The couple will be on O'ahu for a book-signing on Saturday and Sunday.

The book is a how-to guide for coping with every aspect of breakups, from the obsessive e-mailing to the excessive shopping-therapy.

Not only do the authors expose their own bad breakup behaviors, they answer questions from readers — some borderline pathetic — about their own breakup woes.

There's really something for everyone.

It's a roadmap to recovery but with no promises.

"We're not guaranteeing a healing," Behrendt said. "We're putting you on the right path, showing you what's possible. You can take this crappy event and flip it and make it great."

He speaks from experience.

Reach Catherine E. Toth at ctoth@honoluluadvertiser.com.