My daughter knows what she wants. She also knows what she doesn't want.

What she doesn't know is how to compromise.

It's only to be expected, given that she's 2, but lately I've been myself wondering if it's more than that.

Like any 2-year-old, Sloane is exceedingly fond of the word "no," as well as its relatives "not" and "don't."

We happily tolerate it because although her contrariness can try our patience, it also provides comic relief that has diffused many tense situations. There's nothing like a toddler contributing her two cents to an argument to make you realize how silly it was to begin with.

Lately, Sloane has been more opinionated than usual, but I'm the only one particularly worried about it.

In fact, the males in the family seem to be enjoying it more than ever.

Sometimes, as Sloane is delivering a particularly scathing tirade, her father will break into a smug grin, meant to convey, "I know where she gets it from."

She can scold her brother until she's blue in the face, but he generally just laughs and points, often in my direction.

At first I ignored them and just reflected proudly on how Sloane was learning to stand up for herself and use her words, rather than her fists.

That's what they teach in school, right?

Recently, though, I've had the sneaking suspicion she's picking it up somewhere else.

Reality began to set in one day as I was attempting to reprimand her brother. She picked up the rant where I left off, and berated him quite soundly. My son and I couldn't help laughing and he got off scot-free.

Then it happened again. Except this time, she merely parroted me, in a shrill, screechy voice that I recognized as eerily similar to my own.

Once again, my son thought it was hysterical, but this time I wasn't as amused.

Women tend to worry about becoming their mothers. My mom's great, so that's not a big fear of mine.

All of a sudden, I'm afraid my daughter will become me.

The bits of myself I see mirrored in Sloane force me to admit that I still have some Terrible-Two-type traits — except that unlike Sloane, I'm not cute enough to pull it off.

Sloane doesn't worry about whether she's crossed the line from assertive to domineering or self-indulgent to selfish. She's definitely not concerned with whether she's a fair disciplinarian or a tyrant.

While I am conscious of these lines in public, Sloane's mimicry suggests that I should pay them more heed where it counts the most — at home.

Good thing I have a 2-year-old there to remind me to grow up.

Reach Treena Shapiro at tshapiro@honoluluadvertiser.com.