HOLLYWOOD — Calista Flockhart is enjoying a glass of red wine at the bar of the boutique hotel she called home for six months when she began working on "Ally McBeal," the show that, for better or worse, catapulted her into stardom. The Hotel Bel-Air, she says a bit nostalgically, brings up "friendly feelings" and the bar itself, with its East Coast vibe, reminds her of New York, the city she longs to return to so she can perform on its stages again.

That isn't likely to happen for a while. Her 6-year-old son, Liam, just started kindergarten and loves the outdoors. Her partner, Harrison Ford, has a teenage daughter in school in Los Angeles. There's also the six-year contract she signed with ABC to co-star in "Brothers & Sisters," which is attracting 12 million viewers a week and seems to be gaining momentum, especially with women.

In the late '90s, when Flockhart lived in this lush, urban hotel with her dog, Webster, her award-winning turn as Ally — the miniskirted, legal eagle singleton — transformed her from an off-Broadway actress into a household name, giving way to a public persona that has always seemed at odds with itself. Is it possible to be at once shy and divalike, a team player and a prima donna, aloof and warm? Or did the actress just get caught in a cultural flashpoint and not have the desire or wherewithal to shout to the world: "This is who I am!"

Flockhart's reluctance to engage with the media to dispel rumors or explain herself after "Ally" went off the air made her a conveniently blank slate to be filled in with conjecture: She was just like Ally. She was self-centered and neurotic. She was difficult. And had anyone seen her eat? Was she wasting away?

If she was hoping that her reticence would play better when she re-emerged after a five-year absence — as part of a notable ensemble that includes Sally Field, Rachel Griffiths, Patricia Wettig and Rob Lowe — she was quickly dissuaded. Last summer, she stepped into the center of another whirlwind when she appeared on a panel before the media with her cast mates and producers to promote the new show. Flockhart did her best to answer the three softball questions lobbed her way, then sat blankly, shoulders drooped, staring into the audience, as the others played the game. By the time it was over, writers and bloggers from across the country were describing the 42-year-old actress as "miserable" and "spaced-out."

Flockhart responded by disappearing into her work once again. It was only with great reluctance — after the show was a hit and people were marveling at her performance — that she agreed to sit down for an interview.

Flockhart has never been a couch-jumper. She is reserved and private, and she didn't recite prepared anecdotes, but seemed quite aware of the tape recorder. As time passed, she became more open and asked many questions, indicating her desire to have a conversation.

"I don't know what people expect. I don't know what people want me to do," says Flockhart, who is much more upbeat talking about her son or her TV character than being a TV star. "And if they get disappointed that I don't satisfy something that they're looking for, I don't quite know what that's about. But, for me, I was happy and content to be (at the panel). I did my job, I went home and I felt like it was all fine."

Then the news accounts hit. Although Flockhart felt the characterization of her behavior at the news conference was "unfair and inaccurate," she says the articles "did not bother me."

But executive producer Ken Olin did feel badly that he had lured Flockhart away from her nest, where she has spent the last half-decade bonding with her son and enjoying her time with Ford and their two dogs, only to have her lambasted on her first public outing.

"Wherever she shows up, for whatever reason, she's such a lightning rod for media and scrutiny and a certain kind of resentment, and I don't think that's always easy for her but she's doing it," Olin said. "She's had to be tough. That hurts her feelings. When you're held up being iconic and you represent things — and for her these are things that (ticked) off a lot of people: the neurotic, man-hungry female that is a setback for intelligent, liberated women — people take shots at you. But it's this character of Ally McBeal that is held up to represent something that she's not."

Olin and Flockhart's co-workers protectively fill in the back story and shadings of personality.

"You can feel that Calista had parents and has memories and isn't reinvented just because she came to L.A.," said "Brothers & Sisters" creator Jon Robin Baitz, who has known her for more than a decade. "So that accident of having been cast as Ally McBeal could have possibly interrupted a very different kind of career and set it on a different course, one that's more public than she ever imagined for herself. I would describe her as a reluctant star, and I mean that sort of in the most magical way: a reluctant princess."

Field sees the vicious cycle in it all. She and Flockhart have grown close playing estranged mother and daughter. Their scenes together, whether they are fighting, making up or giggling like best friends, are among the most memorable of the series, which centers around five adult siblings, their newly widowed mother and the family produce company.

"She and I talked about it because I've had more years in the saddle, so to speak, dealing with the press," Field said. "I think she doesn't feel she does it well. So she comes in feeling like, 'Ugh, I'm going to get beat up by this.' And so it makes her shy. A lot of actors, when they're put up on a stage like that, they become the class clown and will entertain the troops, as I say. But because her personality is such, the press does what it does. And then the more things hurt her, the more she's reluctant to come out and be there. It builds with her."

Landing Flockhart wasn't easy. The long hours and her meteoric popularity during "Ally" gave Flockhart very little time for herself. She adopted her son during the final season and then devoted herself "to the mom thing" when it was over. Olin and Baitz set out to persuade her to trust them because they knew if they landed her they would get "not just a comedian or someone that can cry," Olin said. "This is someone who came from an emotional depth and maturity that has size and weight to it."

They got lucky — they called at a pivotal moment for her family.

"Kindergarten, as it turns out, is a huge milestone and I wasn't quite prepared for it," Flockhart says softly, looking into her wine glass. "He's doing great and having a lot of fun. I know it sounds kind of silly, but it's the end of an era. It's the end of that baby being home with you and you have to let go. And it's a wonderful thing, but it wasn't easy. It was emotional."

Knowing that Liam would be away for seven hours a day tempted her to meet with Olin and Baitz. "It was really daunting to her," Olin said. "She is a very committed mother and partner to Harrison. I also think her experience on 'Ally' was exhausting. That much work and the dynamics of that show, it was like talking to someone who had post-traumatic stress syndrome. Every step of the way, she just kept insisting that she wanted to be in an ensemble show."

Promised that she would work only two or three days a week, Flockhart finally agreed to play the family's only Republican member. All seemed to be on track until Steve McPherson, ABC president of prime-time entertainment, decided to re-shoot the pilot, recasting the role of the mother, Nora, from Betty Buckley to Field. In the early episodes, the troubled relationship between Kitty and Nora was a focal point.

When several 15-hour days were strung together to make up for lost time, Flockhart became concerned.

"I was constantly going 'Ken, Ken, what is going on? This is crazy. Why am I still here? You've ruined my life.' And he would just say that it was going to get better."