1 Tampa Bay (2) Available cheap: Tampa Bay "2008 World Series Champion" T-shirts

2 Boston (4) Available, but not cheap, psychically: Boston "1986 World Series Champion" T-shirts

3 Cubs (3) Available, but very faded: Cubs "1908 World Series Champion" T-shirts

4 Phillies (5) Phillies gave Ibanez a ceremonial World Series ring, but it dropped in front of him

5 Angels (1) RIP, Nick Adenhart

6 Mets (11) Mets' best show: Santana's pitching. Second best: Santana's custom handshakes

7 Yankees (10) A-Rod's lack of clutch hitting is killing Yanks! Oops, Roidian slip

8 Dodgers (7) Forget about Manny being Manny; let's hear about Hong-Chih being Hong-Chih

9 St. Louis (14) News flash for Fantasy players: Colby Rasmus is not same person as Cody Ransom

10 Florida (13) Most lyrical new name of 2009: Emilio Bonifacio

11 Oakland (21) Where's Eric Plunk when you really need him?

12 White Sox (8) Dewayne Wise lasted two games as White Sox leadoff hitter (0 for 8, 4 K's)

13 Minnesota (9) Joe Mauer's ailing sacroiliac (SI) joint gives whole new meaning to "SI jinx"

14 San Francisco (25) In 6-foot-10 Randy Johnson, the club finally has a true San Francisco "Giant"

15 Toronto (15) Jays ban beer Tuesday, get just five hits: No Labatts and no bats, either

16 Cleveland (16) Carmona (19-8, 3.06 in '07; 8-8, 5.66 since) must have made Fausto-ian bargain

17 Atlanta (24) Braves still waiting for Griffey to reconsider

18 Milwaukee (6) After opening-day loss to Giants, Brewers fire Ken Macha and rehire Ned Yost

19 Seattle (29) Tuiasosopo and Jakubauskas are first 10-syllable rookie combo in M's history

20 Baltimore (26) Counting down the weeks 'til Chris Tillman breaks the hearts of Mariners fans

21 Arizona (17) Chase Field to host 2011 All-Star Game. M's hope Wakamatsu is managing that day

22 Colorado (20) Rockies only team in majors to field nine homegrown players in opening-day lineup

23 Texas (18) Check out Andruw Jones' new movie, Slump Dog Millionaire

24 Houston (12) Vying with Rockies for title of "Recent Series team with least hope of returning"

25 Cincinnati (22) Youthful Reds have highest baby-oil budget in major leagues

26 Kansas City (19) Crisp is best Coco since Chanel (or is that Laboy?)

27 Detroit (23) Dontrelle Willis is leading candidate for the Carl Pavano "Wretched Contract" award

28 Pittsburgh (27) Those Somali dudes are giving Pirates a bad name

29 San Diego (28) It may not be significant, but Peavy's name attached to jersey by Velcro

30 Washington (30) Mike Rizzo is the interim GM, pending Senate confirmation