Why is it so hard for most of us to come from a space of love and spirituality when we know it's what we need most in our interactions with others? 

There's a small word that plays a big role in all of our lives: ego. It's a part of each and every one of us and is the powerful voice within that wants to stand out, be special and be important at all costs. Our ego has no other goal than to fulfill its own agenda and it doesn't care about love, spirituality, compassion, trust or forgiveness. While spirituality is about unity and oneness, the ego prides itself on separation and control. The desire to win, to be right, to judge, to gossip and to complain are the ways in which the ego thrives and basks in the light of its own superiority.

The ego's No. 1 goal is to disconnect us from our spirit or inner being. Being aware of this is the first step toward connecting more deeply with your spirit.

You have the power in each moment to choose to either empower the ego or empower the spirit of love. While it may feel like the ego is so interwoven into your personality that you can't control your thoughts or actions, you are on the right track when you simply become aware of the ego and see it at work from a detached perspective.

You may notice it as a passing thought after an interaction: "Gee, that was my ego talking." Don't discount that thought of awareness! Awareness is one step toward strengthening your connection to your spirit. As you make a conscious effort to choose love, your connection to spirit will strengthen and your ego will have to step aside. Just as two cars can't take the same parking space at the same time, the ego and the spirit are incompatible.

The best way to know if you're coming from the heart or your ego is to look at your interactions with others and how they might play out if you were connected to your spirit. All actions and reactions would come from, love, forgiveness and humility. Fostering an ability to embody these qualities while dealing with the demands of life is not easy, but with focused intent and a desire to come from love, you will find the right words and reactions when you need them.

Coming from a place of love requires an effort to be more understanding, less judgmental and more compassionate. Trusting that any challenge that comes into your life is there for your growth and evolution, gives a perspective. 

When we minimize the ego's control and cultivate spiritual interaction, we embrace our interactions and choices with compassion and bring more happiness and joy to our lives.

Alice Inoue is a life guide, ordained minister, spiritual educator and author of "A Loving Guide to These Shifting Times," available at Sedona at Ward Centre and via www.amazon.com.